Hustle culture tells us that we need to be obsessed with striving, especially if we are to “make it.” But is that true? I recently debated a friend on hustle culture. Long story short, she sees value in it, and I see it as toxic (for me and my needs). I’ll probably get a lot of flack for admitting this, but hear me out.
I don’t quite get hustle culture’s appeal. I grew up with a workaholic father. What was that like, you ask? It wasn’t easy. In many ways, my father expected us to be like him. My father immigrated to the U.S. and essentially had to rebuild his life from scratch. He had the quintessential immigrant mentality, do or die. I’m proud of my father and his legacy. My father was a loving, kind man who wanted the best for his family. Out of good intentions, my father tried to instill his version of hustle culture into us.
He had two simple rules.
- Occupy your time with something, anything.
- If you start something, finish it.
Easy enough. Right?
Well, not quite. I can recall hearing my father’s footsteps coming up the stairs and hurrying to look busy just in case he popped his head into my room. That eventually led to feelings of shame, guilt, and anxiety.
I didn’t know how to relax completely.
I couldn’t quiet my mind during the day and especially at night. At some point, I developed insomnia. I made every excuse for my insomnia; I have my best thoughts at night, I’m a night owl, the list went on and on. The truth was, I navigated the world in an irritable state with severe sleep deprivation. I was always tired and ran on empty. It took me years to get myself sorted. I wouldn’t trade going back down that rabbit hole for anything.
My mental health is not worth an entanglement with hustle culture.
I also saw what hustle culture did to my father after his retirement. His self-worth was predicated on what he was able to produce, and when he couldn’t produce at the levels he once did, it made him miserable. Just know that hustle culture trains you to believe that whatever you’re doing, probably isn’t enough to keep up, and you’ll have to do just a little bit more.
If you’re feeling unsure or indecisive on hustle culture, I say, don’t do anything that doesn’t speak to you OR your needs. If your coworker answers emails after work hours, do you now begin answering emails after work hours because it shows dedication? Grit? Do you sacrifice because it might look good if you’re considered for the next promotion? If you learn that a CEO of a Fortune 500 Company gets up at 4 AM to get their day started, do you now get up at 4 AM to get your day started? This one-size-fits-all practice is detrimental.
Guess who you won’t see getting up at 4 AM to get their 18-hour workday started? Me, because I’m walking to the beat of my own drum.
Frankly, I think it’s dangerous to have conversations on hustle culture without talks of balance. For me, I need an even balance of work, play, and sleep. Don’t get me wrong, I’m comfortable with making adjustments in any of these areas, but you better believe a recalibration of sorts will follow.
If you subscribe to hustle culture, establish your why, and then set a realistic understanding of what balance means to you. And not what balance means to the CEO getting up at 4 AM or your coworker answering emails at all hours of the night. Do you and only you.
For those of you wondering, I walked away from that debate feeling oddly closer to my friend. We agreed on the importance of balance and pursuing dreams and aspirations. We were not interested in convincing the other to see our POV or on being right. Our conversation was centered on two friends sharing their personal thoughts and opinions on hustle culture. Join the conversation, share your thoughts on hustle culture.